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$18.95 Autographed
Copy of A Waking Mind Part 1: Cracks in the Foundation
Chapter 1: Brain Teasers Chapter
2: Roots Giving Way
Chapter 3: Departures and Arrivals, I
Chapter 4: The Nature of an Illness
Chapter 5: Departures and Arrivals, II
Chapter 6: Departures and Arrivals, III
Chapter 7: Departures and Arrivals, IV Part 2: Adjusting Chapter 8: Dating Carousel
Chapter 9: Periods of Adjustment
Chapter 10: Carousel Spin-offs
Chapter 11: Tenuous Employment Part 3:
Contemplations
Chapter 12: Normacly
Chapter 13: Perfection and Redemption
Chapter 14: Reflections on Truth
Chapter 15: Intelligence Measured Part 4: Knowledge
Chapter 16: Family in Crisis
Chapter 17: The Road to a Cure
Chapter 18: Seven Years of Conferences Part 5: Death and
Life
Chapter 19: In the Mind’s Eye
Chapter 20: Adrift Midstream
Chapter 21: Our Better Angels
Chapter 22: Celebration of Life
Epilogue Back Matter
Glossary
Notes Selected Bibliography |
Diana
Lund brings her insightful and witty style to continue her story begun in Remind
Me Why I'm Here: Sifting through Sudden Loss of Memory and Judgment. In A Waking Mind, she
experiences three awakenings after a 1996 car accident and resultant mild
traumatic brain injury. Eventually aware of her sudden ineptitude at her
technical job, the onset of claustrophobia, and unexpected turns of events,
such as setting out for a zoo exhibit and winding up on the kiddie train,
Lund absorbs what it means to be a cognitively-handicapped adult. While
acquiring this new view, she begins to see flaws in her core beliefs about
intelligence, goodness, and truth; faults made by her once rational brain.
Patterns grow clear. Others are struggling in the same neuronal waters in
which she had nearly drowned. Having reached safe harbor, “With insight and unfaltering
honesty, Diana Lund tells the remarkable story of her battle to restore her
body and soul after a mild traumatic brain injury—an injury that is inflicted
upon hundreds of thousands of people.” —Maurice Possley, Pulitzer-Prize winning
journalist “A
gifted observer and writer . . . —Yehuda Ben-Yishay, PhD, Prof. of Clinical Rehabilitation
Medicine, New York University School of Medicine, Director, Brain Injury Day Treatment
Program, Rusk Institute of Rehabilitation Medicine “Diana Lund does a great service for all of us in the field,
and I’m sure, for everyone who has been affected by brain injury.” —Ginny Lazzara, Chair of Board of
Directors, Brain Injury Association of
Illinois “Many
books have been written about living with a brain-injured person. Almost all
are written from the outside looking in. I even wrote one myself. But Diana
Lund gives you a rare glimpse into her bewildering world from the inside.
Gut-wrenching queasiness in one paragraph and gut-splitting laughter the
next. . . . You can't resist the urge to jump into the pages and help
Diana in her cerebral Tug o' War against her uninvited alter ego." —Dan Montville, humor author of Disabled Fables: Celebrating the
Lighter Side of Parenting a Child with Disabilities |
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Excerpts
From
Chapter 6: Departures and Arrivals, III
“Hi, I have a
reservation for Lund,” I started.
The desk clerk asked
me a few easy questions and then said, “I’ve put you in a non-smoking room,
number 647.”
On my slip of
paper, I’d written King Bed. I inquired, “Does this room have a king bed?”
“No. It has two
double beds,” he replied.
“Two double
beds,” I repeated. “Hmm. On the phone, the receptionist promised me a king bed.
I want what was promised.”
“Our reservationists,”
he corrected, “don’t promise a particular bed size. She probably said your room
will have a king bed or two double beds.”
“A king bed or
two double beds,” I repeated him again and briefly paused. “But there was no or.
She promised me a king bed. I want a king bed.”
It seems
ridiculous to me as I write this, why I, one person in the room, had to have a
king bed. On the other hand, I remember how illogical I became, how
single-tracked my thoughts were, and how, by this time in the brain injury, I
knew better than to deviate from my script on my piece of paper.
Looking
agitated, the clerk popped into a back room for five minutes and then returned.
“The hotel is full,” the clerk explained. “All I can give you are double beds.”
“But when I
made the reservation, your receptionist told me my room would have a king bed.
I expect a king bed.”
“And I already
explained that our reservationists! don’t make such promises. Your room has a
double bed.”
My misfiring
brain remained stuck on one thought. I told him again, “I don’t want a double
bed. I want a king bed.”
“A king is not
available, ma’am.”
“I want a king
bed. Find me a king bed!”
Frustrated with
me, the clerk scurried to a back room again. I waited for ten minutes until he
reappeared.
“There is
nothing more that we can do for you.” he snapped. “Let’s complete this
check-in. I’ll need your credit card.”
Over the
previous year I’d been trying to construct coherent verbal retorts. Like an
intruder had duct taped my mouth shut, I could only squeal yes or no. Expansion
of my reply or movement of the conversation in a different direction hopped
beyond me. Only later when I mapped out the chat on paper could I analyze the
situation and then compose new thoughts.
Quite angry by
this time, after having survived a wretched journey, I restrained my hands of
guck from gesticulating and growled back, “If you are not going to live up to
your promises, then you need to find me a room at another hotel.”
I felt startled
by my response. How did I know to say that?
A look of
disbelief came over his face. He pushed back. “That is not possible. We have a
convention in town. All the hotels are booked.”
Holding my own,
I demanded, “I want to talk to your manager.” It was as if the old Diana, the
project manager who removed obstacles from her path, stepped back into my body
and took control.
He hightailed
it to the back room again. When the manager stepped up to the counter, without
resistance, she gave me a king bed and upgraded my stay to include (at no extra
cost) a living room, dining room, and kitchen. After we completed the
transaction, I took the card key with my magical blue hands, obviously responsible
for my special powers this day, and relished my monotonous focus, one of the
few upsides since the brain injury. At last, I had penetrated my mind’s barrier
and emerged with alternative tactics, and this re-surfacing attribute netted me
a tangible victory. I smiled. Traveling with my head in the clouds might
not be so bad after all.
From Chapter 15:
Intelligence Measured
I had a fine brain if you don’t count the time I stapled my thumb
when I was five years old (inexperience with loading staples). Or when I smoked
marijuana in my teens (peer acceptance). Or when I locked myself out of my car
on a date with a man I adored (preoccupied). If I ignore the time I surfed in
dangerous undertow when my friend nearly drowned, and if I forget about driving
alone to the top of a mountain during a blizzard to go cross-country skiing (no
challenge too great), then I can consider my young self smart, a person who
basically kept herself safe.
Since chance
intervened (a car accident) and changed my biology (my brain), the frequency
and essence of my stupidity changed. I move a pot of soup from the stove and
into the refrigerator, and forget to turn off the burner (unable to keep
parallel thoughts in my head). The open flame burns for five hours before I
discover it. I socialize beyond my bedtime (unable to keep track of time) and
then later that night can’t sleep because the mental activity has
overstimulated my brain. Grogginess renders me useless for the next couple of
days. During an in-class assignment for a required course at work, I complete
the first three exercises, then take a break. The teacher had asked us to work
on the first seven exercises (short-term memory loss). I know better, but for
months, and for some tasks, for years, and for others, possibly forever, I
don’t do better.
But what of my
intelligence have I lost? On the inside, I still feel bright. I remember how my
brain used to get from problem to answer, and I still have a wealth of
hard-earned answers locked inside. With the brain injury, intelligence didn’t
leave the confines of my body.